Emotional Icons

He was brooding … and all through the chat session with me, he kept complaining that he didn’t feel like writing again. The symbol :( was all over … and I could sense that he had developed a feeling against writing.

I wrote – ‘we can’t live if we don’t express, can we?’

He seemed to agree. On the same note, I wrote again – ‘to write is to live this virtual life, isn’t it?’

This time he smiled … and soon this happier icon emerged on the chat window – :)

A smiley needs no introduction. Nor does the sigh … emoticons are friendlier these days. When these were introduced to me a few years back, I had initially frowned. Not knowing whether a person can really show such emotions virtually.

To this date, I have smiled, frowned, sighed virtually … and every time I do that (at times they are reciprocated by another virtual person), I feel extremely curious.

Did the person actually do ‘that’ while she (or he) was typing those words for me?

Pure selfish thoughts, but I feel for that moment when a person punctuates words with that exemplary symbol of emoticon attached. Feels like a thousand words in addition to the text.

Emotions on Net aren’t rare … but when they come in the form of symbolic icons, I feel a change from the way I interpret the accompanied text.

Am I becoming a too addictive to cyber emotions? May be, I always was.

During an interesting chat, I prefer to tease with fewer words but leave a wink … the wink that has grown into a cult symbol now among friendly circles. They are so like the real life, where a ‘strategic’ wink adds more value to the prank … and delivers a sporting feeling within the conversation.

Interestingly enough, I like those who have made ‘wink’ a form of art while they text. Not sure whether some are shy in using that, though in India there were societies that once discouraged a wink, at least the physical one!

Do they still do so? I would never know.

An exception is when someone gets angry, there is a considerable lesser use of emoticons. I don’t fully understand that, but could be because there are fewer icons to represent the facial expressions of anger.

Frustrations can be vented, yet the use of emoticons could have made it even more meaningful. Just as there are no emoticons to show mental sadness … and for those darker times of gloom. Why would that be?

Years ago, a friend was devastated that the guy who she had loved had to leave her life. We had a conversation that lasted an hour … and she sounded completely distraught. A poet that she was, her words were deep and meaningful. At times she did stop for a moment to ponder on her life.

There was a need for emoticons … at least for the silent flow of tears that I could feel coming from her words. I felt as if she needed something more to express.

Alas, she could not. There were no emotional icons to deliver the punch in her sadness.
Her heart was heavy, the mood sullen … yet such emotions were limited to using only words. Nothing more added to the meaning.

Looking back, I like to ask – are emoticons only for comfortable times?

This may not be true always … but emotions are well expressed when they are dark and deep. Also when they hurt the most, and in case they hurt our own self.

The question is – whether someone would like to use icons even during sad times. I am consciously open to a debate, though there isn’t much to suggest why they won’t. If they could give a big grin or stick their tongues out in jest, why would they not silently post a symbol in case they fall short of words … when they just feel too heavy inside to write something meaningful to convey?

To this date, I feel for the lady on that day. She remained unexplored on emotions!

Ending on a happier note, I must mention this young friend of mine. She is an angel, a person who had a not-so-happy past as a child … but has definitely expressed her emotions to me at times to free her soul. Needless to write, I have tried my best to give my full support. The other day she was so happy after I wrote her a mail encouraging her to never look back at her life.

In that happiest moment after reading my mail, she felt ecstatic. And in response, she wrote only two lines. She wrote,

“thanx a ton ….

Muuuuaaaaaahhhhhhs … and loads of ‘em for ya”

Virtual kisses! Don’t they give the feel of the same moistness as they do in real life?